Kurt Nelson » Random

Life Tidbits I

Kurt — Fri, 25 Nov 2011 06:11:46 +0000

If you are unhappy with something, fix it.

If you are unhappy with someone, communicate it.

Controlled rants are good, they let you organize your thoughts.

A blog post is often just a controlled rant.

When in a room full of people, you can often learn more by observation than conversation.

Are you a conversation circle floater or commiter?

Stand your ground when confronted until you get a full scope of the situation.

Politics and religion are a great discussion item, but only in small groups.

The Interview

Kurt — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 16:33:19 +0000

Welcome, grab a seat, sit down, make yourself comfortable.

Do you need anything? A coffee? What would you like in it? I’ll get you some sugar, I’ll be right back.

So what interests you in this position? I know the benefits are excellent, but that’s pretty standard for your role in this industry .

Ah, you are drawn to working for me. Great! That’s what I like to hear. Give me a second to look through your portfolio.

Wonderful. Nice work here, I like the risks you took with it, they really pay off. As you know, working for me means I expect you take part in our endeavors to live a healthy lifestyle. Also, as you probably have figured out, this role is not appropriate for married or even in a relationship prospects due to the commitment involved. I can’t actually ask you your relationship due to hiring laws, but I’m strongly suggesting you volunteer that information to me so we can make the best decision.

Oh, you eat only vegan? Interesting. I’m a pretty big fan of meat myself, I find a way to live healthy while still eating it.

Are you a morning person or an evening one? I find that it is of utmost importance that you would tend to be awake when I am so I can call you at any time.

What’s one of the hardest challenges you’ve had to tackle in a previous position? Oh, you’ve been fired by a previous boss? What was the reason?

Wait, you’ve worked in this same role for someone else before?

Well, uh, that about wraps things up here. Tell my receptionist to send the next prospect in.

Oh, and remind her to stop accepting applications via the mail from Russians.

Swinging

Kurt — Mon, 04 Jul 2011 22:06:14 +0000

A dark cloud approaches. There is rumbling in the distance, it is dark, and getting darker. I still sit outside on the lawn, swinging back and forth, back and forth, for no reason. People scamper down the sidewalks faster than normal for no reason, the sky is just getting darker, no reason to fret. It swings back and forth with me on it, requiring prodding every couple to keep going. The rumbling is dark, and is getting darker, the sky is loud, and is getting louder. Yet I do not care. The sky does not rule me, the rumbling does not intimidate. I just keep swinging, back and forth, back and forth. Slowly, the world starts spitting at me. Larger and larger until it stings. Balls of water are now flinging themselves at me, but I just keep swinging. It will stop, I am in control of it, not it of me. It slows down like rain to a nice sprinkle. I keep on swinging.

Sketchy Business Offers

Kurt — Thu, 10 Mar 2011 21:48:14 +0000

Anyone else find the quality of this email quite entertaining? I think working for them would end up in a visit to The Daily WTF.
I think it’s a higher unprofessional wording and the use of the term xCode Master shows cluelessness. Sadly I think this type of “development” is on the rise with everyone thinking they are capable of making iOS apps.

Hi there,

We are looking for a local iPad developer for a special project immediately! We are located in Clearwater, FL. Phase 1 will take 2-3 days. The individual we choose will work under an xCode Master and the project is fully specked/mapped out. Please contact us if you or someone you know qualifies. Proficiency needs to be very high to qualify. We will offer a salaried position for Phase 2 if you are interested. And we are nice. Let us know!

Alicia
Business Director
MacTutor, Inc.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

FileMaker Tools
ALWAYS Assist Your Expansion,
as they Replace
the Work of People.

Entertaining Banality

Kurt — Tue, 04 Jan 2011 07:03:11 +0000

Is “Entertaining Banality” possible?

What are reality shows? Or Twitter?

Lair of a grad student

Kurt — Sat, 05 Jun 2010 05:06:34 +0000

I found this in a closet of the Klaus computing building.

Mainstreet, U.S.A.

Kurt — Mon, 24 Aug 2009 18:44:47 +0000

A clump of yellow shirted tourists sits and wanders around on the sidewalk appearing to kill time, maybe waiting for a parade or a spontanious street show that will not happen. A couple, likely european, walks down the street on the left side, oblivious to the balloon hawker. Children skip ahead or lag behind their parents taking in the many sights that only they can see. Trolley tracks dissappear into a mob of lost tourists, planning where they are going to go next. The sky is perfectly clear, adding to the relaxed atmosphere. The clocks are all partially hidden, no one actually cares what they say except the balloon seller. The castle at the end of the street is taken for granted, ignored, just a marker of where everyone is walking. The street is completely shaded, no need to hurry to get out of the sun. The sun only hits where it is aestetically pleasing for it to, on the tops of buildings, the castle. The whole street is meant to relax, and it most definitely does so.

jPPP Moved to Google Code

Kurt — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 20:25:51 +0000

jPPP now has a repository along with forthcoming documentation. All releases will now be downloaded at http://code.google.com/p/javappp/ The most up-to-date version is in a zip file in the main repository. jPPP now matches with the codes coming off of the GRC website.

Messing With Spammers

Kurt — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 20:49:01 +0000

I was sitting here on IM bothering no one when I see “sanjeev0907@gmail.com wishes to chat with you” I accept it because why not?

3:27 PM sanjeev0907: Hi

me: hi

sanjeev0907: How are you doing

me: fine…

sanjeev0907: Well my naame is sanjeev

3:28 PM An SEO expert

me: oh great.

I thought this was someone I know

3:30 PM what company are you with?

sanjeev0907: I can increase traffic and ranking on search engines

Clearpath

Clearpath Technology

me: and how much does this stuff cost?

sanjeev0907: It depends on website

3:31 PM we have different packages

USD250 30 keywords

me: for you to come up with a list of useless words?

sanjeev0907: Not useless

Keywords do miracle

3:32 PM me: then how far up can you get my site?

sanjeev0907: it makes your website to reach to 100s

First page on all search engines

Google Yahoo MSN

with best traffic

3:33 PM me: well first off, I know how to do that my self. second, there is no way to guarentee such a thing. third off, you have not done much research, because I have the first result in google for my most important terms already.

sanjeev0907: all right

3:34 PM i know you must have the keywords on first page

Can you please tell me once more your web site name

me: hah. great marketing!

please remove me from your list. SEO is junk, and I can do it myself. This is an unsolicited commercial message, and is thus considered spam and is illegal per the Can Spam Act. I will be reporting your gmail account, and will be spreading the word on how your company uses these tactics.

3:35 PM This conversation has been recorded, and will be posted all over the web to make a fool of your company.

sanjeev0907: Well i have not tried to make fool of you niether i want to sale any thing you show interest

3:36 PM once haad replied to my executive that is why iadded you today

me: nope. some form of spam.

sanjeev0907: otherwise i can understand how intelligent you are

No!1

No spam

I am a real person you can call me

3:37 PM My name is sanjeev sharma

919911576171

me: Can I have your company information to verify if it exists?

sanjeev0907: yes

www.clearpathtechnology.com

but please first i would lik to see your website

me: Thank you. I will be reporting them to the BBB. I will now block you.

Thanks for providing entertainment Sanjeev! Little does he know I already have the first result in google for my name, and that he spilled to me the list of emails for all his contacts!